It's almost 1:00 am, and I am sitting here typing this post to pass the time until Sayer falls asleep (I am rocking his bouncer with my foot!) He's almost there, so hopefully I will be in bed in a few minutes!!
Sayer is 4 weeks today (actually yesterday as it is now Monday I guess). I can't believe how fast the time has flown by. I've tried really hard to savour these weeks when Sayer is so tiny and cute, because they are gone so fast. But sometimes, it really is a struggle to not wish them away to a time weeks from now, when he will not be such a fussy eater, and when he will sleep longer. I totally forgot how challenging the first weeks of having a new baby are, when each feeding takes almost an hour with all the burping and changing, etc. Yesterday was the first time that I didn't have to feed Sayer, as Nate let me go out by myself. I went and saw Penelope (yes, by myself, it was great! A great movie too!) and then went to Costco. Just that little break from feeding, was very rejuvenating. It really is vital for my sanity to get out and be able to do something for myself.
I have also been thinking a lot about patience. A few nights ago, Sayer was having some tummy troubles, and I found myself getting mad and frustrated. I have realized that patience is pretty much one of THE MOST important parenting tools. I've noticed in the last couple of days, since I have been trying really hard to be patient, that I am enjoying Sayer so much more, crying and all. It is amazing the love you can feel for these little souls, if you just open up your heart and let yourself, instead of being angry that you can't be in bed sleeping. I really do just want him to feel better, and find that I almost enjoy spending that time with him and being the one to make him feel better... ALMOST! HAHA. Just kidding, I really do. Being a mom is the hardest, and best thing I have ever done!
I also just have to give a shout out to my amazing husband. I am lucky enough to have Nate home most mornings, and he has been kind enough to get up with Asher in the mornings so that I can go back to sleep after I feed Sayer around 6:00 or 7:00. It makes such a
big difference. I'm already so tired, I can't imagine how I would feel if I didn't get those extra couple of hours in the morning. I can tell that Nate is really trying so hard to be sensitive to how I am feeling and what I need help with, and I appreciate it so much. It makes me realize what a sucky wife I am, I can be so selfish sometimes. I am trying to be better, Nate is definitely such an example to me of service. I love you Nate, thanks for all your help. I couldn't do any of this without you!!!
Sorry for the cheesey-ness!
Ok, Sayer is asleep now, so I should get to sleep before he wakes up again. Sorry if this post doesn't make sense at all! I will post some 4 week pictures tomorrow sometime.