Sayer during our community room clean up. This kid loves to help clean and pick up toys. He had so much fun washing the legos, and didn't mind a bit that his shirt was soaking wet from the taskWe got rid of Sayer's binky tonight. I have been telling him for a few days that we were going to throw his binky in the garbage tonight, and he has always responded with an enthusiastic "o-tay", so I thought I had sufficiently prepared him. Well, first of all, it was a hectic night with friends and tantrums, so maybe I should have postponed it a day or two. But I decided to just do it. I cut the tip off and let him have it. He promptly said "uh-oh" and cried a little, and stuck his finger in the little hole. He tried to make it work. Then I said we needed to throw it in the garbage because it was broken. He said "no". But, we eventually made our way to the trash shute in the hall, and he finally put it in there and we let it go. It was traumatic. He cried. He kept crying... for about 10 minutes after we put him in bed. Then it got quiet. Then we heard laughing and playing. Then Asher and Sayer got in trouble and Asher lost his sesame street viewing privileges for tomorrow morning. Then it got quiet again. Then there was more playing and laughing. Nate tried to take care of it. No offense to Nate, but he just doesn't have the authoritative voice sometimes. He came out and said they weren't tired and that they were both happily playing with toys in their beds and reading. I said "well that's not happening". So mean mom goes in, takes away toys and sippy cups and books. Sayer screams at me and then receives a little flick on the mouth. When I went to apologize and kiss him, I noticed that his face was covered in blood. Apparently he got a bloody nose at some point during the hour that he was crying and goofing around with Asher. (and no, it was not from the little flick I gave him, promise) I took him to the bathroom to clean him up and he kept asking "wha happen?" I tried to explain his bloody nose and that he couldn't have his binky anymore. It didn't help that he kept asking "why?" in his sweet little voice. I finally was able to lay him down, put his blanky over him and give him his baby bear, and walk out with no crying. He seemed like he finally understood that there was no binky, and that it was time to go to sleep. I didn't hear another peep out of them.
So, we'll see how it goes. Part of me aches to give it back to him. It makes me SO so sad to see him sad. But the fact of the matter is, he doesn't need it. He is at the point where he is starting to talk more, and it is becoming a hindrance. I have to take it out of his mouth when we read books in order to get him to answer my questions. When all was said and done tonight, he fell asleep just fine without it. The only problem is, he has it a lot during the day. It really is a comfort to him, and he always asks for it when he is sad or getting ready for bed. But he does have his baby bear, so it makes me feel so much better knowing that he still has something that he loves SO much to comfort him. Hopefully it will just take him a day or two to get used to not having both his baby and his binky together as a pair anymore. Hopefully I will be able to be strong and not give him one of the 2 binkies that I have hidden in the apartment. I can do it. Wish me luck.
**Update**
So, today was ok. During the day is turning out to be more difficult than at night, but he is doing well. We had a tantrum when he woke up, and another one later on in the morning, and then a little crying before his nap and bedtime, but he didn't even really have to cry himself to sleep, he just cried for a minute or two. Tonight went a lot like last night, but I think that has more to do with Asher and Sayer going to bed together, when they haven't been recently. Asher hasn't been napping as often, so he goes to bed at 6pm a lot while Sayer still goes to bed at 7pm. It works out nice. But when they go to bed together, they play and fall asleep later. But then they still wake up at 7 am, so they are both tired, so Asher takes a nap during the day, which means he goes to bed with Sayer. Get it. It's a vicious little cycle. Anyway, that's all. Here's hoping it gets a little better each day.
**Update**
So, today was ok. During the day is turning out to be more difficult than at night, but he is doing well. We had a tantrum when he woke up, and another one later on in the morning, and then a little crying before his nap and bedtime, but he didn't even really have to cry himself to sleep, he just cried for a minute or two. Tonight went a lot like last night, but I think that has more to do with Asher and Sayer going to bed together, when they haven't been recently. Asher hasn't been napping as often, so he goes to bed at 6pm a lot while Sayer still goes to bed at 7pm. It works out nice. But when they go to bed together, they play and fall asleep later. But then they still wake up at 7 am, so they are both tired, so Asher takes a nap during the day, which means he goes to bed with Sayer. Get it. It's a vicious little cycle. Anyway, that's all. Here's hoping it gets a little better each day.
9 comments:
We just did this too. After hearing everyone's horror stories, I decided to do it at one year. I figured the earlier we did it, the less traumatic it'd be. But Sayer's 10 minutes of crying sounds much less traumatic than Hanne's 45. It turns out Hanne had a cold though. Stay strong! Whenever I want to give the binky back, I just remember those 45 minutes. I wouldn't want them to be for nothing.
You won the award for the most post in my google reader in one day!
So, I understand the whole pacifier dilemma. I don't give Harrison his at night anymore. I was really worried about having him get too attached to it. I still give it to him during the day occasionally and at church a lot. He is still young, so I think he still needs it. Anyway, I'll figure it our someday.
you CAN do it! be strong!
that is seriously tragic how he kept asking you "why?" sweet little guy.
At 1 I took Peytons bink away during the day and told her, "your bink stays in your bed". She would take it out and throw it in her crib. Then at 18 months, when I took it away completely, she was pretty used to the idea. If you HAVE to give it back, try just doing it at night for a little bit. Good luck either way! You can do it!
ash, yeah, that's what we did with asher and we didn't have any problems at all. i should have done that with sayer, but i just decided to do it cold turkey for some reason. if it gets bad, i will go back and do that, but i am hoping he will be ok. so far during the day is the hardest anyway.
I loved all these updates.. Sayer is my FAVORITE!! Good luck with the weening. I had a binky until I was 3, so good job for not waiting that long :) PS.. Tyler was looking over my shoulder last night when I was reading these. He saw the Pretend post pictures and was TOTALLY coveting your rug.. "It looks SO soft." Lucky :)
Ya, binkies are tough. I think Oliver is going to be one of those kids that could care less. Sometimes I forget to put his binky in when I put him down and he is asleep before I realize that I forgot it. Keeping fingers crossed.
you are amazing to stick to your guns. Sometimes I am such a sucker. I can't say that I know what you are dealing with, none of my kids took binkies- to much of my dismay. But you will be so glad that you took on this challenege before #3 comes!
Congratulations!!!
Having just done this with Lilly four months ago..oh, how the internal debate goes. I wish they could have their comfort without the dependance but it IS GOOD to do it sooner than later. :) Stay strong! It is worth the price once they forget, and they will forget about it. Good job to you too! Mommys deserve the rewards too. :)
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